Timeless child

                                                            When I was a timeless child

                                                                                                   When I was a timeless child

                                                                                                                   

                                                                                       I had no worried, no fear

I would run into the deepest part of the forest

Looking for fairies and bees

No concerned, no cares, no tears should be shed

                                                                                                

                                                                                                                   When I was a timeless child

                                                                                          

                                                                                         I would laugh and dance

                                                                                                                    

                                                                                                                        For what felt like years

                                                                            

                                                                                    The world was not yet so clear

                                                                                                                     

                                                                                        So innocent and deer

  

  When I was a timeless child

I use to play with my dollies

Till now I still have some of my babies

My brother made me laugh by acting all folly

I still remember the first time we watch Wall-E

Power

This is a story of me finding my voice that was so deeply hidden.

My senior year in high school, I join the Lenox and St. Stephens teen organizer community, and the mission was to bring together the youth,  fight for jobs, and help put a stop to the violence in the city. Every Tuesday and Thursday it would be meeting, Training and meeting, so, I started doubting my decision of joining the organizing team. Months went by and it seems like I didn’t find any ones of my so claim power or special talents, so I became less interested and I started to believe that I just didn’t have one. Then, one week I was assigned to the lead the youth job rally, I had to make a speech at the state house, and met with some members of senate and congress team, right then and there I was on the path to finding my voice. When the day came to lead the rally, I transform into someone I barely recognize.  I was screaming, chanting, demanding for more youth jobs, with a  burst of energy and a heart full of passion, I finally recognize what my power was I didn’t have the power to fly or teleport but I had the power to stand up for an important cause and make a different.

Belittle by strangers

Applying to college was one of the worst roller coaster ride I’ve ever got one and not getting to go to my dream school was one of the most heart breaking things I had to deal with. Throughout high school, I worked very hard to get into my dream school, from having the right grades, to the clubs, to sport, and the after school curricular, I did it all to get it. When the time came to send out college application, they were the first one send out, and the last one I heard from. I remember coming home and seeing that envelop and got so excited and so nervous at the same time. I tried feeling it to see if there was a tape banner inside because that would mean that I am accepted, I didn’t feel anything, so I grew more nervous. I waited three days to open it, hopping that if it wasn’t an acceptance letter, it would magically change overnight. When I finally opened it, it felt like I won a million bucks. I got accepted with a merit scholarship of 25,000 year for four years if I maintain a certain G.P.A, man I was happy, until I look at my financial and saw my gap with how much loans I would have to take. Right then and there I knew it was a bad sign, but I told myself not to give up. So, I tried every way I could think to go to the school, from writing the financial office to calling the school almost every day, still nothing. So focus on that specific school, I totally about the rest and complete miss all the deadlines. When I finally snap out of it, it was too late to call the other schools and all that work was for nothing. I was completely devastated.  When the time came to tell the school what college you decided to go to, everyone was so excited to talk about getting into their dream school and I didn’t want no part of it.  Secretly, I envied them, for all the right but wrong reasons. I didn’t feel like they worked as hard as I did or it’s not fair they got more money, and the list goes one, but I couldn’t blame it was my fault, I was to focused on just one school, so after crying and being mad I decided to get over it. I told myself that was another way, and maybe its good thing I didn’t go.

Strengthening

Practice makes perfect! I find that reading about movements and watching inspirational movies helps me when the time comes to stands up for things that I am passionate about. I think that  meditating have help me a lot, it’s like taking the time out to  evaluated things and cleanse the mind of many toxic thoughts. Classical masterpiece help balance and inspire me. I think several of things works in many different ways.  

Holding hands with an angel

Dear P
      How are you? How are things? I know we haven't spoken in a while, mostly because you never answer anymore. I guess time isn't on our side, and you were right, college isn't has bad as I thought, I  just have to learn how to  manage my time a little better, but so far I seem to be hanging on. I'm writing you today to let you know that I miss you so much, as well as to thank you for everything you have done for me. Thank you for not only being a great cousin but an amazing mentor.Thank you for running to my rescue whenever I was in trouble. Thanks for taking the time out to really get to know me not as another family member but, for the person I truly am. On multiple you occasion,you have prove to me that you can play varies roles from a cousin, to mother, to a sister, to a best friend and to a mentor. Thank you for picking me up whenever I was down, took care of me whenever I was sick, made me laugh whenever I was sad, and most importantly, thank you for being you, and being one of the person I truly count on in this world.
     
     I remember meeting you for the first time when I was eight-years old, and though about why we look so alike, but when my mother introduce you as my cousin everything just made more sense. Ever since then you were more than just any other cousin, you become a teacher. You have taught and showed me that I could do anything if I was put my mind to it. You help my mother when she was down, pick me up and dress me every school year. You made me deals with some things I didn't want to, and for that I thank you, because I am now a less angrier person. You made me realize that in order to forgive someone, you have to forgive yourself . You taught that, 'giving back is one of life greatest gift', and you don't have to be loaded to give, because 'giving when you don't have a lot to give is a great sacrifice'. You have play a role in molding me into the person that I am today, you've have truly made me better.

  Even though you have been here since birth, you still still miss a lot. It wasn't until my junior year in high school that we reconnect. It seems like you knew exactly when to come around, because everything was fall apart. Now, sitting here as I recall being this angry 16 year old girl, who was of fighting life and its trick, and you being this angel, holding my hand through my darkness days. I was so angry back then and, it felt like that anger was never going to go away because of the pain  that left but you help me. You made talk about it, and advise me about letting go the pain because " it takes the light away from you". I use to think that talking about things didn't really help, but through time I notice that i had became less angry and hurt.  Now, two years later, i'm less angry, less hurt, and stronger than I was before. Thank you for all that you have done, and I love you from the bottom of my heart.

Sincerely,
Loune

Holding hands with angels

(This poem is dedicated to the person I love most- J)

You ever held hand with an angel

because I never knew I could be able

to be the person that I've become 

I though it was all just a fable 

sitting across this table

looking at you,my Angel.

Yes! you! You gave me life!

You save me when no one else could

You took the knife

away from my enemy

my God you are the perfect remedy

right there you became my clarity 

you really know how much you mean to me.

Now in this reality 

surrounded by all this tragedies

you seems to be the only melody

that stills gives me energy

I still hold all of our memories

they will be my greatness Legacy.